The Groundhog Saw Something

Happy Groundhogs Day!!

51 years ago my parents got engaged on this day!

It is also the first day of the 12 Days of Valentines. A wonderful little tradition I no longer implement.

And it is also the birthday of an old missionary companion and friend. Happy Birthday David Holt!

February 2nd is a fun kind of day!

Unless you are a Bronco's fan.

Since groundhogs day was also on a Sunday, I had a lesson to prepare. I spent the early morning hours of the day pondering on my lesson. And, while preparing for my Sunday School lesson, I received from the Spirit an amazing insight for my lesson and for life. It was an "aha" truth of the day.

The first thing the Spirit posed was a question:
"Is there a plan?"

As I thought about this question I thought about my recent weekend in California with my family. For this trip, unlike some trips I have taken, there was a plan. In fact it was a very specific, time sensitive, secret plan. My girls and I had been planning it for months.

And we only had five days to complete the task. Lucky for us, in addition to Saturday and Sunday, the girls had Monday, January 20th off and Tuesday January 21st was Davis County teacher prep/career ladder day.

So we scheduled each stop and knew exactly where we needed to be and when we needed to be there. Of course traffic, weather and other factors would alter things a bit, still we stayed true to the schedule and everything worked without a hitch.

Speaking of hitch, it was the beginning of getting hitched!

Life isn't a random and chaotic fluke that is the result of a big bang or latent evolution. Life is a grand plan of Divine design, and we are the children of God and have been give a plan for our redemption. We just need to find and follow it.

The Spirit further guided my lesson with the following thoughts:

Like a scientist that proves things by testing and becomes an expert, learning things by text book isn't enough, we must experience and test for ourselves; to prove all things and hold fast to that which is true.(1 Thessalonians 5:21)

In fact life is a test. We are the experiment. We learn line upon line as much, if not more, by experiment as by study.

In Alma 32, Alma tells us to "experiment" on the word.

Another key word is "try".

From Alma we read:  "And now, as the preaching of the word had a great tendency to lead the people to do that which was just—yea, it had had more powerful effect upon the minds of the people than the sword, or anything else, which had happened unto them—therefore Alma thought it was expedient that they should try the virtue of the word of God." (Alma 31: 5)

"But behold, if ye will awake and arouse your faculties, even to an experiment upon my words, and exercise a particle of faith, yea, even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that ye can give place for a portion of my words." (Alma 32: 27)

"Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither must ye lay aside your faith, for ye have only exercised your faith to plant the seed that ye might try the experiment to know if the seed was good." (Alma 32:36)

Note that experiment and experience have the same root word.

Again from Alma, but this time the words of Amulek:

"My brethren, I think that it is impossible that ye should be ignorant of the things which have been spoken concerning the coming of Christ, who is taught by us to be the Son of God; yea, I know that these things were taught unto you bountifully before your dissension from among us. And as ye have desired of my beloved brother that he should make known unto you what ye should do, because of your afflictions; and he hath spoken somewhat unto you to prepare your minds; yea, and he hath exhorted you unto faith and to patience Yea, even that ye would have so much faith as even to plant the word in your hearts, that ye may try the experiment of its goodness, And we have beheld that the great question which is in your minds is whether the word be in the Son of God, or whether there shall be no Christ. And ye also beheld that my brother has proved unto you, in many instances, that the word is in Christ unto salvation."  (Alma 34:2-6)

We learn in the temple that Adam and Eve sought further light and knowledge and learned by their own experience good from evil.

A testimony of God is more than what you think of Him, it is experiencing Him.

How important then is experience? Look to the following scriptures for the answer

"And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us." (Roman 5:3)

"And now behold, I ask of you, my brethren of the church, have ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts? "(Alma 5:14)

"And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." (D & C 122:7)

From the LDS Guide to the Scriptures comes instruction about wisdom: "A person gains wisdom through experience and study and by following God’s counsel. Without God’s help, man does not have true wisdom (2 Ne. 9:28; 27:26)."

Finally from Psalms:

"For thou, O God, hast proved us: thou hast tried us, as silver is tried." (Psalms 66:10)

Therefore life is a test, God will prove us to see if we are true and faithful. We will prove Him by Faith, His word, and by our own experience. Life is a proving period and a proving process. "We will prove them herewith" (Abraham 3:25) and "by their own experience" we will see if they choose light over darkness.

Perhaps the highlight of the day was that I was able to bear testimony today in church of the Lord's plan of happiness. I am grateful to a God for sharing so much of His wisdom. Today I had many "aha" "eureka" "lightbulb" epiphanies that literally moved paradigms and shifted my perspective.

The groundhog wasn't the only one who saw something today.

Promise and Possibilities

Tonight I did something I haven't done in awhile. I watched a documentary. It was about Mitt Romney. A behind the scenes look at his two failed campaigns to become President of the United States.

There was no commentary or voice overs, just raw dialogue between Mitt and family. It was a penetrating look at the effort to run and the pain of loss.

I once wanted to run for office, be a politician, be a church leader, even a general authority type, but 48 years have past and I am mostly past my prime.

But life is still full of promise and possibilities, and I am so very excited for something else to look forward to, or really someone else to look forward to. If you didn't know already, I have found a soul mate and have asked her to be my eternal mate! I now pledge my allegiance and love to Shannon, my one true love. She has given life new meaning and purpose and I am thrilled beyond measure to make her my life and spend the rest of my life with her.

Perhaps it came as no surprise when I asked her, but the way I asked her was a surprise. We had been dating for six months but I had been planning the proposal for quite some time. I innocently invited her and her two daughters to join me and my three daughters on a weekend trip to Las Vegas. Little did they know that that wasn't the real destination. After one night in Vegas at a motel, I told them we must get up early and load the car so we can move to a better hotel. But after the car was loaded I insisted that we first do some shopping in Primm. Nevada.

When we got to Primm, the Outlet Mall was closed. I acted surprised and said "let's go a little farther to the outlet malls of Barstow California."  And, as planned, the Barstow outlets are a ghost town of their former glory, so when we arrived and shopped for only short time I said "let's just go back to Primm because the Outlets will be open by now."

But when I got on the freeway, I headed the car in the opposite direction. It took only a matter of seconds for Shannon to notice and let me know I was headed the wrong way. Then, on cue, Macee said"Let's go to the beach" Shannon and Abby and Amanda were so excited for the beach, but that was only half the surprise.

I told them we needed to stop at my favorite Chinese restaurant first. I pretended to be lost and needed Shannon to find it's Fullerton California location on GPS. When we pulled in the parking lot, I distracted the group as McKenna, my oldest daughter, went in to the restaurant with specially made fortune cookies we had brought with us.

When the coast was clear we all went in and ate the wonderful Chinese food. After we were done, one of the staff brought out our chocolate dipped fortune cookies which, to their surprise, were filled with all the same fortune inside. The fortune was written in a Disney Font. It read: "Dreams Do Come True In The Happiest Place On Earth"!

Tears of excitement flowed as I handed an envelope to all six at the table. Again, with names written in Disney handwriting, we opened our individual envelopes to find passes to Disneyland and California Adventure!

Our next stop was the beach for a beautiful sunset. We could hardly sleep at the Anaheim Marriott that night because we had a very big day ahead.

The next day was a holiday and the parks were crowded, but we still had a wonderful day at both parks. Although it was January, the temperatures were in the 80's. 10 degrees warmer than usual! I was able to break away from the group long enough, in the morning, to ask for help with my proposal plan, and, just before dark, as the plan finally was able to unfold. Then around 9:00 pm we went to the World of Color light and fountain show where I had specially arranged VIP seating.

During the amazing visual animated water spectacle, there is a scene where Belle says, so tenderly, to the Beast " I love you". Immediately after, there is a lull of silence just before the big finale.

So right after Belle announced her love for the Beast, I went down on my knee, and with all 5 girls watching and cheering,  I asked Shannon to marry me! With tears of pure joy streaming down her cheeks, she said "Yes"!

The finale was everything we had hoped it would be and we left the park deeply in love and feeling like a family.

Life is full of wins and losses. I have experienced both. But I have never experienced such joy and hope as I have for the past 28 weeks, and that special night in Disneyland.

Our goal is the temple, and the date is June 13th!

It's How You See It

Life is not what it looks like, it is how you see it. It is not what is in the picture, but how you view it. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder because what we perceive matters the most to us.

We are byproducts of our upbringing and life experiences. Our behavior is shaped by what believe and how we were raised. Our belief system and value system are shaped early in our life and so much of how we act is based on our conditioning. We can't escape all early influences but we are not destined by them. We have more choice over our lives than we take advantage of and, in they end, how we finished life will be much more important than how we started it.

The argument isn't over who is right and who is wrong it is how they are right and how they are wrong. The world asserts it's beliefs and it's science; we assert our beliefs and our revelations. "I was born that way" or "I cannot change" are arguments purporting science. But God is the ultimate author of what is right and what is wrong, not science. And God speaks truth through revelation. Science is valuable but it is the new Tower of Babel.

Faith in Jesus Christ is the greatest answer since Christ is the greatest solution. With God all things are possible and He wants to help us with all of our problems. We just need to have the faith to believe.

God manifests His divine love to us through an abundance of love and inspiration. Even chastening is evidence of His unlimited love for us. Our welfare is His welfare: it is His work and His glory.

Following Christ is not a casual but continual process.

It is in the qualifying and receiving of the Holy Ghost that we are refined. That mighty change of heart is both literal and possible because God's amazing grace attends His Holy Spirit as the Holy Spirit attends to us. Infused by that Spirit we are comforted, guided and ultimately transformed.

When we feel His Spirit, He is changing us.

One Year Ago Today

Someone once said out of every negative situation can come positive possibilities. One year ago, today, a homeless man name Robert, passed away in my parents basement where he had been staying. My youngest brother took it exceptionally hard because it was Ryan who first came across this drifter.

Until that moment I hardly knew my brother Ryan. He is 22 years my younger and I moved out and married before he was 8. One week after Roberts death, Ryan and I took a trip to Paris. A few days after we came home, my sister Amy and I with her husband Rob and Ryan took a trip to Rome. In February, because Ryan was awarded the top sales award at Delta Airlines, he invited me to join him at a company celebration on the Islands of St Kitts and St Barts. I would never have seen these parts of the world without Ryan.

The passing of Bobert, as I affectionately called him, was a tragic end to a sad story. But his passing was the catalyst that introduced my youngest brother to me. Our brother trips gave us a unique opportunity to share some memories. In many ways he has been a brother’s keeper. Ryan has given new meaning to my mantra brothers helping brothers.

2013 was a whirlwind year of trips and travel. In April I took my mother and her sister to Paris and Rome and Venice. In the summer I took my 3 daughters on a trip as well. 

As I close 2013, reflecting on the passing of Robert and the positive connections made with Ryan, I realize that life is short, but life can be sweet.

Thinking of Christ

Today is the 1st of December and yesterday I forgot to buy something I was planning on buying. I forgot to buy a chocolate advent calendar for my children.

All of us have special holiday traditions and for some that means counting down the days until Christmas. As a boy I fondly remember the advent calendar my mother made for us. On it she had sewn a felt flannel Christmas tree and 24 pockets filled with homemade felt Christmas ornaments. Beginning Dec 1st, my sister and I would take turns, decorating the tree with the special ornament we pulled each day from a pocket on the calendar.

Some advent calendars are filled with little chocolates and children count down the days until Christmas by popping open little windows filled with chocolate candies.

Although it isn’t too late to buy a calendar and start counting down the days, the lesson I learned from forgetting the calendar, I believe will help me better remember the true reason for the season.

It is said that we are what we think about most and unfortunately sometimes we forget Christ in our words, actions, and conversations. Thinking about Christ, especially during the Christmas season is what the season really is all about. But with all the hustle and bustle and other Christmas traditions, we sometimes forget who’s birth we are really celebrating.

There is a scripture that states “we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins.” 2 Nephi 25:26. In order to talk of Christ and preach of Christ we need to be thinking of Christ more often in our lives.

There is a scripture in Mosiah that states: "For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?"  Mosiah 5:13.  Perhaps this gives new meaning to that portion of the sacramental prayer that states "Always Remember Him."

It is my hope that I will remember Him each day until Christmas day and every day thereafter.

The Spouse Trap

One of my favorite games growing up was one that I found in my grandmothers attic.  My sister and I were exploring one day and we found this amazing game that would have belonged to my mother and her siblings when they were young and living at home.  The same game exists today on store shelves with almost identical looking pieces.  The game is called Mouse Trap.

One thing that made this game so interesting to me as a boy was the fun of assembling each part of the elaborate trapping mechanism and the ultimate chain reaction that occurred when attempting to capture the mouse.  Each component was unique and creative but, standing alone, each piece would not have been enough to capture the mouse.

I think I want to write a book called "The Spouse Trap" How to Catch and Keep the Girl. Although not an original title, this slight variation from the fun board game of my youth would be a fun and catchy title.  I realize that spouse catching instead of mouse catching is hardly the same endeavor and is a crude way of talking about courtship and marriage and although I am not a proponent of trapping someone, I am interested in finding the necessary components.

Assembling all the components of good dating, courtship and marriage, is not an easy task.  Neither is finding and keeping an eternal companion.  It used to be that finding an eternal companion was the hard part, but with the ever increasing divorce rate, even in the church, it is clear that finding the right components to keep a marriage intact is more important than ever.

Assembling all the secrets, steps, keys, and pointers of a good marriage into one book would be difficult, if not impossible.  I think of my attempt at finding the many ingredients for a happy marriage more of a project than a manuscript.  And, for those of us who have been divorced, many of the lessons learned the hard way are some of the missing ingredients we lacked the first time around, and maybe they really can’t be learned from a book. 

Still, for me, looking for truth and writing down ideas have become a great source of inspiration and even revelation from God.  The very fact that I am searching for answers to tough questions and problems puts my mind and heart, if I am humble about it, in a better position to learn wisdom from on high about love and marriage. This inspiration if captured and retained in my heart will help me catch and keep the woman of my dreams.

Stay tuned for an excerpt from Chapter One:  To Try or Not To Try. 

  

Twelve Horses

In the popular children's story, Snow White & the Seven Dwarfs, the little men that took Snow White into their home all had noticeable personality features.  Each character had a character feature, whether it was a strength or a weakness, that easily separated and identified the one from the other.  There was Grumpy, Sleepy, and Sneezy, to name a few.  The prominent feature became the name or nickname of that dwarf.

In a different house, there were twelve brothers.  The House of Israel was divided into twelve tribes because there were 12 sons of Israel.  Perhaps each of the 12 sons of Jacob had a personality feature or character feature that was distinct to that son.

Just as Jacob’s sons were uniquely different with different strengths and weaknesses, we are all children of God and we have our own set of unique talents and gifts.

But we also share some common character features that are universal.  Although these features can be divided many ways, I have chosen to categorize them into 12 areas.

Picture a stage coach being drawn by 12 horses or a sleigh being pulled by 12 dogs, our personalities and characters are driven and pulled by the following 12 forces:

Physical

Mental

Emotional

Social

Spiritual

Sexual

Financial

Personal

Parental

Marital

Patriarchal

Recreational

While two oxen can pull a wagon, sometimes additional strength and energy is necessary.  The word horsepower comes for a time before automobiles when additional horses were added to a stagecoach or wagon to increase the power that comes from adding more horses to a team of horses.  Balancing the load between 12 horses would increase the speed and strength of the transport.

A team of dogs attached to a sled in the Arctic would have a similar effect even though the needs and weather conditions are different.  Dogs can run fast and more dogs would increase the capacity of the load. 

Dogs and horses are harnessed together in two rows.  Each horse or dog is also harnessed next to another dog or horse in a kind of yoke.

When we think of yokes we usually think of wooden yokes and two oxen pulling a covered wagon.  While a yoke can be fastened to two oxen, equalizing or balancing the load pulled by dogs or horses is as important as equally yoking a pair of oxen.  The yoke connects the animals side by side but also balances out the heavy weight of the load.

We each have more than two character categories that require we learn to find balance in our lives.  Our character is pulled by at least 12 of these categories and we can easily over exaggerate a few while neglecting others.  We could be physically fit, for example, but spiritually empty.  We could be in shape financially but be a poor spouse or parent.  We might even excel spiritually or intellectually but be emotionally unstable.  Like the panels of a parachute or an umbrella, balancing isn’t just important but is also essential. Think about how tragic it would be if one of the panels in a parachute didn’t function properly.

Consider the apparatus of an umbrella and all of its working parts.  An umbrella has a canopy that is divided by spokes.  Each spoke is connected to a canopy of fabric and to a wooden or metal stem.  When the umbrella is in working condition, the spokes open and close easily and the fabric is stretched to create a canopy that protects the user from rain, snow and sun.  If the spokes break or the fabric tears, the umbrella becomes ineffective and useless and is usually discarded and replaced with a working model.

The highest and best use of our agency requires that we have self-discipline.  When we discipline ourselves, we strengthen our character and we can strengthen the categories of our character necessary for us to be effective tools in the service of the Lord.  When we manage the sum total of all of our parts, we have balance and that balance creates the synergy necessary to be, among other things, healthy, wealthy, and wise.

We neglect our weaknesses when we ignore them or fail to notice them.  Just as the parts of the umbrella can be easily broken, we can easily get out of balance or sync.  The 12 character components listed above are like cogs and wheels in a fine watch that, when working properly, work in synchronicity with each other.  Over compensating in one area while neglecting another area of our character may not at first seem too detrimental.  The athlete who doesn’t focus on school may have a few good games, or even a professional sports career, but at some point, somewhere in his or her life, the lack of balance will become obvious.  This gives new meaning to the scripture.  “Even as ye sow, so shall ye reap.”

Let us harvest the highest and best use of our character by balancing our attention and self-discipline in all the key areas of our lives so that our lives will work in harmony with His.  “Be ye therefore perfect” becomes a more definable goal when we recognize that there are areas of our lives that we need to improve, and that our God and Creator knows us and understands them and can help us reach them.